Just a Girl and Her Laptop

Rise of a Silent Hellion

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October 7th, 2014

I don’t know what I want or need.

I’m angry and sad and jealous and scared and all sorts of things.

Things are shaky with the boyfriend and now he’s a million miles away spending time with someone else..

I need to sleep.

Filed under fuck I ruin everything.

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September 13th, 2014

I’m down to my last nerve with my 17 year old sister.

She may not intent it but she constantly talks to me like I’m an inferior being.

I may have a wide range of emotions that often get out of control but that does not mean that I’m stupid. I may not be heading off to a good college or going to college at all but that does not mean I am not intellectual.

I am not you, I will never be like you and I damn sure am not worth any less than you.

We are equals. Just people trying to figure our shit out. Please come off your high horse and treat me like a human being. My emotions are part of me, they do NOT make me any less worthy of respect.

Filed under personal family change i don't like it siblings sister aquarius emotions

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AAAANNNNDDDDD……….

Have I even freakin mentioned how wonderful my boyfriend is? He is fantastically sweet and understanding regardless of how moody and kerbobbled I can be (ooohohooo and let me just tell you! I can be so hot and cold). He reassures me when I need it and can often tell when I’m upset even before I can.

Now don’t get me wrong he’s got his little blunders every now and again, no one is “perfect”, but somehow that just makes him all the more lovely and perfect for me. x D

I really don’t understand how he ended up with me, there’s no doubt in my mind that he deserves better, but still he loves me to other universes and back. I just hope that one day I can become the woman I need to be and that she is the woman he truly deserves.

Filed under personal love life ldr

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September 10th, 2014

Strange poetry in the middle of the night…I’m a weirdo. I’m tired too.

I’m trying to decide if I want to continue with this blog or not. I tend to use it as a place to vent and whatnot but I have been quite a bit more consistent with pen and notebook recently. So much so that I decided to give my little notebooks volume numbers.

……….

Anyway, I think I may want to get into editing or something of that nature. editing writing, not films or anything like that. Might be a dumb idea since I’m not the most grammatically inclined and my spelling is terrible. It could be fun though. I was thinking about writing but what in gracious name would I even write about!? I’d need to be really inspired. So I suppose the plan for now will be reading more, editing writing as I can and writing my own works when I get the inspiration. Hopefully that will get me somewhere.

(P.S. help I can’t figure out how to live my life!!!)

Filed under new ideas editing writing help life grammar volume 1 journaling personal